Saw this on reddit and had to take a look. Below are my favorites, but do look at the full entry.
I live just outside of Cincinnati and the best one I have heard was “The Reds are playing downtown.”
The communists are in the fun house.
The Red Square is full of communists.
The red scare.
There will be blood
I call it my girlfriend’s monthly event her “exclamation point” because just calling it a period wouldn’t do it justice.
In the red
It’s shark week!
My boyfriend is terrified of getting me pregnant, so when that time of the month arrives we call it “the good news”.
Somebody’s poisoned the water hole!
All right kids it’s “Avoid Mommy Week”.
Lady Town is under construction.
Japanese flag week
Riding the cotton pony”
My girlfriend calls it blowjob week. I love my girlfriend.
My wife calls it DIY week. Don’t get married 🙁
Captain Zygote and His Ragtime Band on Parade.
Surfing the crimson tide
Paying for that apple.
The painters are in.